Matching with a Surrogate
How Intended Parents and Surrogates Are Matched
Promise has successfully matched hundreds of intended parents and surrogates since 1995. We understand what makes up a healthy parent-surrogate relationship, and we use our expertise and personal experience to foster each and every match. Our team will get to know you, your hopes and preferences in your surrogate and journey to find the right match.
How To Find a Surrogate
At Promise, our Matching Specialists work closely with you to ensure we find you the best possible surrogate match using our proprietary MatchMade™ process. Because of this, our intended parents and surrogates go on to develop strong bonds during – and after – their journey.
Your Matching Specialist
From your first meeting with Promise, we will ask you how you imagine your surrogacy journey. When you are introduced to our Matching Specialists, they will continue to get to know you and ask you to complete a parent profile. Answering these questions helps our team find you the best surrogate match for your journey. We have decades of experience putting intended parents and surrogates together who form deep bonds throughout the surrogacy and beyond.
Our Surrogacy Experts Are With You Every Step of the Way
The matching process is one that may bring up feelings of apprehension and nervousness. With our guidance, we hope that you can feel excitement at the prospect of being matched for this extraordinary experience. At Promise, our team finds meaningful matches for you, specifically; meaning matches are hand-selected based on the preferences of both parties, plus additional criteria such as location and legal fit. Our rigorous screening process ensures the top 4% of surrogate applicants are exclusively made available to you.
Surrogate Matching Considerations
When gestational surrogates and intended parents begin working with Promise, we'll ask them questions to help our team find the best possible match. Matching specialists will support intended parents while Surrogate Advisors guide surrogates through the process.
Promise will ask intended parents and surrogates their preferences on the following:
- Level of communication they desire with each other during and after the surrogacy
- Location (intended parents can share a preference for state/area of the country, while surrogates can share a preference for IPs in the U.S. or living internationally)
- Number of embryos to transfer (single embryo or multiple embryo)
- Views on selective reduction and termination
Finding The Right Surrogate Match
While our Matching Specialists do a phenomenal job of matching parents and surrogates, there are times when we'll share a match that doesn't feel right. Giving honest feedback on why you are saying no to a match will help us get it right the second time.
The criteria you use to determine a good match is personal to you and can include:
- Some parents look to hear why a surrogate has applied to do a surrogacy journey
- Some gestational carriers like to hear the intended parents' story – how they met, and why they are interested in growing their family
- Other times, it's a gut feeling that it's "right"
"When we started our video call to get to know the intended parents I connected with them instantly and just knew immediately that I wanted to help them!"
Shared by a Surrogate
Parent & Surrogate Matching FAQs
Below are some common questions about matching intended parents and surrogates. You can read our full list of FAQs about the general surrogacy process here.
We ask intended parents to be in touch at least once a week from the time they meet their surrogate match until delivery. Some people choose to have more frequent contact than this, especially around the time of the birth. We encourage the parents and surrogates to do whatever makes them feel comfortable.
Even though this rarely occurs, a surrogate can change her mind at any time before she's pregnant. Our thorough screening process greatly minimizes the chances of a potential surrogate deciding to back out after matching with their intended parents.
If you have concerns about your surrogate during pregnancy, the most important step is to openly communicate those concerns with your surrogate and your surrogacy agency within the framework of your legal contract. Discuss potential issues and address them proactively with the support of medical professionals involved in the process.